grit

new pick new pick... hehehe...

got two new oinkies to replace lost ones...

***
so far so good...things look alright...kiddos are ok and erm, things are alright...heart's a little lighter and erm, i've got oodles to think about...so, yeah...

this year's going to be one of many changes. last year had been one of those uncomfortable settling down periods you know? when you don't quite fit in anywhere and things seem to be shifting here and there preparing for a change that has not come and so, being stuck in such a situation makes things rather crappy. this year, there will be change. certain things have already happened and i welcome them, grateful for the change. i have no doubt that there will be incredible challenges in the future months but i'm determined to hang on and i will. i will survive. in fact, i've got something to prove. last year, i was a disappointment. it was like the year when i effed up. this time, i'm hitting back. i'm going to prove me to me and then, i will leave. with a bang.

if you've ever doubted me in anyway or thought lightly of what or who i am, think again because i'm hitting back. this is the me you don't normally see but then again, this is the reason why i have always survived. because, when i've hit rock bottom, the only way i know how to go is to blast myself right up. i am going to make things right. i have to. i need to. i have to prove it to me. i refuse to be a disappointment.

you won't even know what hit you.