instrument

Instrument.

It seems that this word sums up the recent things quite nicely. Allow me to explain -

It's the SYF season again! For the uninitiated, SYF is also known as the Singapore Youth Festival and every two years, concert bands take a shot at getting the gold medal. I was part of one such band many, many years ago. The practices, the scoldings, the pressure...It was unreal. I remember wanting to quit many a time but I never could bring myself to do so. I was a scared, egoistic shithead. Go figure. Well, I took a looksie at the following site and what dya know, it's a gold yet again. Surprise, surprise. Somehow I recall that I wasn't that confident years back when I was put in the shoes of the performer. However, once a band girl, always a band girl they say and erm, I guess there's some truth in that. A friend's doing some band-related stuff and somehow, talking about it came so naturally...I guess, in spite of the everything, I loved band. So yeah, and to think the whole conversation started with a simple "instrument".

On another note, another colleague seems to be in some kinda mood swing. He sees himself as an instrument, a tool used by others. Honestly, it's crap lah...to a certain extent, he is indeed an incredibly intelligent and talented person which means that he would unwittingly attract folks seeking some kinda help. I mean, he's "the guru" but seriously, he's not a tool. At least not to some of us. He's instrumental to the programme we're conducting, not the used instrument.

And yes, it's me again. I kinda feel like an instrument at times. But then, perhaps, I'm just like my colleague...it's all in the mind. It isn't a pleasant feeling but I guess you really need to take two steps back to take it all in. Just to make sure that things make sense. Then perhaps, you won't feel so used after all.

Adios.