whirl

It is a good job. It can indeed be rewarding in a way that other jobs will never be able to match up to.

But the price to pay is a little too high. The emotional roller coaster can leave you a complete wreck. It isn't even funny.

I'm just feeling a little torn. Part of me's relieved that the subject did ok. However, I can't help but just feel completely dampened given the circumstances. I will give up my 100% for more of my kids to qualify for uni. But as it stands, this is it.

So, even as everyone around congratulates us for jobs well done, seriously, does it matter? What is the point in a tiny group of teachers looking good if a big group of kids are crying their hearts out?

But...I am going to take whatever good that came out of this. I will not reject the pat on the back. But, forgive me if I'm less than ecstatic. Forgive me if I can't help but feel rather worn out.

*
Today has been a funny day. I have managed to laugh, smile, ponder, giggle, cry and frown. Most importantly, at least I know that I still feel.